When Devan got home from school, he found Alayna getting dinner ready in the kitchen and sat down at the island.
“Hi, honey! How was school today?”
“Really? Why not?”
“Because I got in trouble.”
“Trouble? What in the world did you do??”
“I didn’t do anything! I just asked a question and the teacher said I said something in-nuh-pro-pree-it. What does that mean, mommy?”
“Inappropriate means you said something you shouldn’t have said. What did you say? Were you making toilet jokes again?”
“No. I only do those at recess. We were watching a movie about how baby animals get born–”
“Are born. How baby animals are born.”
“There were little duckies and little freezer bunnies–”
“Freezer bunnies, Devan?”
“That’s what they looked like, mommy!”
“Ok then…finish your story.”
“There were little duckies and freezer bunnies and llamas, and they were all having babies!”
Alayna was a little concerned about where this story was going and wondered if she needed to write a note to his teacher about showing graphic content, but she wanted to hear this story out.
“…and the duckies came out eggs! Then the freezer bunnies were trying to tackle each other, and the teacher said that was where little rabbits come from. I asked her where did Sim babies come from, and she said that when mommies and daddies love each other, they play together and make a baby. I said, what kinds of games do they play? She said they play different games, but most of the time they play at night while I’m asleep. I said I hear my mommy and daddy playing games all the time!”
OH. NO. HE. DIDN’T!!
“Y-y-y-you hear us? How? I mean, when do you hear us?”
“When I get up to get juice when I get thirsty. The teacher said that was inappropriate. Was that inappropriate, mommy? I told her I know mommy and daddy play games because mommy is always cheering!”
Alayna was mortified and just wanted to crawl under the covers and die. His inquisitiveness wasn’t inappropriate. It was natural, and she didn’t want to discourage him after his teacher made him feel bad. So, she quickly took her vegetables and added them to the chili so he couldn’t see how red her face was.
“…do you, mommy?”
“Do I what, honey,” Alayna asked trying to keep a straight face.
Although she mortified, she thought this entire situation was hilarious. She didn’t dare turn away from the stove.
“Do you win the games?”
OMG…and it just keeps getting worse! Kill me now!
“You better believe I do,” she said under her breath.
“Hey family,” Roland said as he walked into the kitchen. “Something smells good!”
Oh, thank the Watcher!
“Hey, babe! Your son was just telling me a very interesting story that he shared with his entire class about the games we play…at night.”
“Hey little man!”
“So, what’s this about games?”
He had no idea what he was asking.
“My teacher said that mommies and daddies play games together at night and that’s where babies come from. So I said I know my mommy and daddy play games all of the time because I hear mommy cheering! Does mommy win the games, daddy?”
“He gets up to get juice in the middle of the night, apparently,” Alayna added.
Roland was speechless for a minute, but before he started laughing hysterically, he answered Devan.
“Yes! Mommy always wins.”
Alayna gave him a look that said “darn right I win!”
“So does that mean you made a baby?”
If looks could kill…
But he’s so cute.
“No, we didn’t make a baby…I don’t think. Let’s eat…and talk about something else…
“…how did you do on your spelling test today,” she asked.
“I did good. I think I missed one word.”
“One word? That’s great, son,” Roland said.
“So,” Devan began again, “what does mommy win?”
“The game! Does mommy get a prize?”
“Oh yes,” Roland said confidently.
“Ummm…should you be encouraging this, babe? Let’s talk about–hey, Dev! Your birthday is coming up in a couple days. What do you want to do?”
“What does she win, daddy?”
“Oooooh! That sounds coooool!”
Thank you, @aroseinbloom! 🙂